Authenticity: It is Safe to Be You

Written by Sheri Bessi

I carry the belief that human beings exit the womb in pure and perfect form.  As infants we enter this dimension whole, complete and enough. In the beginning, there is an eagerness and readiness to recognize and share our unique and magical existence.

As newborns that are 100% spirit beings having a human experience, we are just rearing to rock our new world.  We are brand new little organic sponges ready to receive what this place and time has to teach and offer. And then BOOM! Total eclipse of the sun. What happened? Why did the magic of being brand new fade? Well, perhaps it didn’t. Perhaps it just got cloaked.


Unless you were raised on another planet, by Buddha momma, with absolutely no negative energy ever coming your way, you, like the rest of humanity, are a victim of first stage personality.

First stage personality is a shield that is primarily geared at protecting and defending your core identity from any harm. This particular “personality” is a human construct built initially on the premise of defense and born of rejection and fear.

While you may not start out with a personality you do start out with a core self. A self that is genetically programmed to be openly original, curious and also cautious. It is after all a new, unknown and potentially dangerous world out there, and spiritually you know this. As a small child you have neither the physical nor the mental maturity to survive on your own and at some level you know this too.

Who will feed you when your stomach hurts? Who will change your diaper when it is wet? Who will hold you close and comfort you as your body is growing and you feel a pain you do not understand?

Your only form of communication is either smiling or crying. You don’t even have words. So quickly you learn that if you scream, your loving and mature parents will respond. Buddha momma says, “oh sweet little thing, I understand that you cry when you need to be changed, and that’s how it should be, that’s how I know what you need. I will change you now.”

But one day you use this technique to express a need and for whatever reason it triggers one of your parents own negative life experience buttons. So instead of getting the same beautiful, kind and loving response you are used to, you find yourself on the receiving end of displeasure. And the only thing you understand is that you can’t mess with the harmony you have with your only parents because if you do, you might very well die. And thus your cloak is generated out the need to adapt and survive in an occasionally not so loving and sometimes hostile environment.

As you continue to get older, the curve balls of your life experience slowly grind down your confidence in your wholeness, your pure and perfect form.  You, the innocent young being, begin to develop your own emergency response system. You start to grow the A around your A-corn.

For as the shell of the acorn protects the precious seed inside, the cloak (ego) of defensive mechanisms do the same for your heart (spirit). And thus your personality takes on its many I’s. All to protect yourself from the potential threat of pain and non-existence that you feared when you were totally dependent upon the ADULTS.

So now what? Does this mean that you must continue to live your day to day life using the same belief systems and strategies that you established while growing up? Does it require you to keep the same learned navigational routes you’ve been traveling on through a very multi-messaged environment? No. You have options. Whew!

Stage two personality to the rescue!

This is the journey of everyday alchemy (transformation) leading you to our own unique voice. A journey where you can identify the many “I’s” you developed. Disappointed I, Fearful I, Sarcastic I, Hopeless I, and how the list can go on and on.

Now you may give yourself permission to lay them aside because they no longer serve you. They are in direct opposition to the version of the original life you were designed to experience. A life desire filled with an intoxicating urge to be fully alive not just living. A passion that didn’t go away, but rather decided to hide out in the attic until it was safe to come out.

Dear human, it is safe to come out.

The life that has always been yours and that you have been searching for since the day you first dawned the cloak of fear is tapping on the attic floor, banging on the attic beams, reminding you that you still exist through various symptoms such as a yearning to be understood, a desire to explore the mind of others and a passion to know and be fully known.

The only thing in the way to living consistently in your total wholeness is yourself.

Remove the boards from the attic door, take off the locks, and go up there and reconnect with the YOU that is hiding out. The YOU that felt fear, rejection and confusion who is sitting in a corner scared to use your voice. Take that little pure being into your own heart again. Invite your inner-child to join you at your table of NOW. Remember that you can now take care of yourself and you can now make decisions based on your strengths instead of your weaknesses from once upon a time.

Through your attention to the dimensions of your being — your body, mind and spirit — you will find that you are perfectly equipped to live your dream life. By listening to the wisdom of your true core essence and re-training your active mind to adopt the beliefs, perceptions and speculations that fuel your passions, you can open your heart to love yourself and your fellow travelers. You can create the life of which your dreams were made.

And that my beloved you, is the beginning of developing stage two personality, otherwise known as your authentic self.


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