Expand Your Love through Music

My intent with this article is to bring more consciousness to love through a lens most of us see every day, mainstream music. The word conscious is defined in the dictionary as aware of and responding to one’s surroundings; or it can also mean awake or having knowledge of something; aware. My belief as to why the focus of consciousness has been on the rise in the spiritual community and beyond lately is a certain level of ignorance leads to numbness. A certain level of numbness creates an experience of pain, it’s possible as a society we have experienced this level of pain and it has been so strong we are making a choice to wake up and address our pain and move into pleasure. One can only do this with knowledge and awareness of what is in their surroundings which then the focus goes back to consciousness.

Here in America mainstream music tends to be pervasive no matter what sub culture or economic stature you fall into. Music that is picked to be played on the radio is then used in movies then used on television shows which is then played at the grocery stores which is then played at the clothing stores and supermarkets and ads and beyond. Even if you avoid this, there are ads on the Internet which most people use now that uses the current ‘trendy’ music. Especially if your work has the radio playing you are quite aware of the current handful of songs that are on rotation as the season and year goes by. But how often do you take the time to actually listen and understand what the lyrics to the song are saying.

Listening here is more than an eagerness to memorize the lyrics so you too can sing along to the cool beat and instrumental part of the song. It’s more than knowing the lyrics to be an expert or show your level of fandom to the artist. Listening here is about reading the lyrics and being conscious of what the story or message or words they are trying to express. Most people that I have come across in my personal life are unaware of what the top hits are actually SAYING in their songs. Often times I would have a conversation with my mother who loves to keep up with the current songs that I don’t like a certain song that is being showcased throughout our culture in ways that I shared above. More often than not my mom would ask why that is. I would then say without singing a lyric that comes straight from the song and my mom would say that does sound bad or a level of shock and revert back to saying she doesn’t pay attention to the meaning or she doesn’t take it seriously and just sings along. I know my mom isn’t the only person who has said or thought this. Yet we learn by repetition, that’s how we memorize new vocabulary, learn how to do math, learn a sport or new dance move all of this through rote repetition.

Through this article I am inviting you to potentially a new level of consciousness. I’m going to share some subtle messages placed in music about love and making love and bring them to the surface. I’m going to offer you my perspective and potentially a new way of loving…


Music is an integral part of my life, I’m sure others can relate to this. I listen to music for many reasons beyond hearing a nice tune. I use music to fill the space I’m in be it my home or my car with good energy, music is a way to clear energy. Music lights me up and makes my day easy and I use it to balance my mood and support me in remembering my happiness. Music heals my body through binaural beats and solfeggio tones. Music sometimes expresses emotions or experiences that I have yet to find words to convey and allows me to move through them and claim my story.

Music is magic to me because it uses words and frequencies to transport me to another world or place in time. I know I’m one of the many that experiences this, from movies to scientific study has been done on the power and transformation music can create in people. Along with this music also has a suggestive quality to it and puts us in certain mindsets and moods just by listening to it from a subconscious or if practiced conscious experience. Think of what magic might happen adding this power of suggestion music holds and transformative qualities if repeating a song, especially with lyrics. I’ve sometimes listened to a song for an hour or two before moving onto another, okay maybe with that one I’m the only one who’s done that! With all this knowledge I’ve personally became mindful with the messages and stories that I listen to and limit my exposure to certain songs with lyrics that don’t resonate with me or feel inspiring.

Integrating songs that discuss romance and sex in an uplifting way is one of the ways that I’ve moved into awareness and built a stronger foundation in my life. Uplifting is defined in the dictionary as: “morally or spiritually elevating; inspiring happiness or hope.” To me, music that inspires happiness and elevation in romance and love making is one where the lyrics express all participants involved as enjoying themselves, respecting and honoring each other, and expressing fun and playfulness in everyone’s love and romance. One big aspect of conscious music related to sex and romance for me is lyrics that discuss joy and curiosity in exploration with emotional and physical nakedness also known as intimacy.

In contrast to this, what I find lyrically in popular music when it comes to love and love making consistently is a hardness in experience. A focus on consuming, a lack mentality or reacting out of fear, or unconscious desperation in love and sex is prevalent. Even artist who are by most considered to be out of the box and unique and forward thinking out of the radio top 20 set tend to have these same qualities of unconsciousness with love. Here are a few quoted lyrics from various genres of music, out in the open, expressing and supporting this ideal:

“Go deep,
Imma throw it at ya,
Can you catch it?
Don’t hold back,
You know I like it rough.” – Skin by Rhianna

“Yeah, I had a bitch, but she ain’t bad as you
So hit me up when you pass through
I’ll give you something big enough to tear your ass in two”–Blurred Lines by Robin Thicke ft. T.I.

“Right from the start
You were a thief
You stole my heart
And I your willing victim”– Just Give Me a Reason by Pink ft.Nate Ruess

“I belong with you, you belong with me, you’re my sweetheart
Love – we need it now
Let’s hope for some
So, we’re bleeding out”– Ho Hey by The Lumineers

“Just keep them kisses comin’
Yeah keep ‘em comin’ all night
Don’t stop killin’ me baby
Don’t stop drivin’ me crazy”– Keep Them Kisses Comin’ by Craig Campbell

From country to hip hop we see this hardness with love and sex. I’m here to offer another option.

Soft can be the new it factor if you choose. Explore the next time you are with your lover, what occurs when you take moments to gently hold hands and with awareness feel each part of their hand with your fingers and hands. When you take a shower take the moment to slowly and gently use your cloth or sponge to caresses your body. When you put on your clothes at the beginning of the day take the time to linger and easily guide them on your body. What happens the next time you kiss mindfully, slowly, and with gentle awareness of your pressure kiss your beloved? What changes in your world when you act from the place of your touch and kisses are calming and nurturing to all recipients?

Here are 5 lyrics and songs that I find to be conscious, soft, and expansive in love. Because these are my personal music taste the genres might not be as expansive as the ones mentioned above.

“Girl, you open me, I’m wide open
And I’m doing things I never do
But I feel so good, I feel so good” – Differences by Ginuwine

“Exotic, erotic, just filled with passion
In bed is the only time that we would be clashin
You’re honest, loyal, a heaven-sent blessing
Not tryna run you drag, I just had to confess it”- Sumthin’ Special by Will I Am

“Baby don’t you rush me, no
You got to take it slow
Just let the feeling grow
Until it overflows
Anyway you want it now
Just gotta tell me how
To give you everything
You’ve even dared to dream”- Bliss by Mariah Carey

“Love is the harmony
Desire is the key
Love is the melody
Now sing it with me”- Melodies and Desires by Lykke Li

“Let your eyes meet mine. For a moment let your heart be mine
Come to me, I will take away your sorrow.
Come to me, I will open your tomorrow.
Come to me, I will open up your heart.
Come to me, we will never be apart.
Come and you will find the inner one”- Come to Me(Embrace) by Wah!


What happens when we bring calming, nurturing, tenderness, and a new level of intimacy in our romance and sex lives? I encourage you not to throw away hardness in your life but to bring balance and more softness in your life!

jess cyrstal

Jessica Crystal Joy is a feminine empowerment educator that has been studying spiritual and self-improvement work since 2001. She provides articles, workshops, and presentations geared towards women being confident in speaking their desires and requirements in their life and to their community using their intuition and deep connection with their bodies. She is known for quickly creating an environment of safety and expansion while incorporating the many tools of Mastery Systems in her work to go beyond a person’s past limited belief systems. She provides practical ways to be and live from a deeper empowered state of being. She has a B.A. in Psychology and is a Certified Tantra Educator, Certified Angel Intuitive Guide, Yogi, creative writer for multiple e-blogs such as New Earth Media and Wake Up World and OmCities.com, featured internet radio show guest on shows such as Journey of Possibilities and Simplicity Radio with Brian Treybig and Changing Minds Online, blogger and social media/website maintainer, professional speaker, essential oils expert, and vegan. For more articles and ways to work with her check out her website http://jessicacrystaljoy.com.