It quite literally pains me to write this but it’s too important not to share. As much as we Spiritual people like to open our Hearts and share our experiences with others we also have to be Self-Aware. As we begin to find our Spirit withIN we have to be Awake and Aware of others who may still be looking for “God” in an external and judgmental way. I had an experience recently and felt it was important enough to write and share about even though the content is somewhat negative and, for me, a bit disturbing.
If you are a regular reader of this blog you know that Blueprints for Butterflies is more than just a blog and that we are also Spiritual Life Coaches assisting others in the Awakening process. Our philosophy is that our Spirit is withIN and everything in our reality is Created from the vibes or energy we are giving off, our energy signature if you will. This is the Law of Attraction at play in a very big way and if we have deep-seated issues or traumas that are lowering our vibration we can attract people looking to prey on these lower vibrational emotions. Like attracts like, it’s that simple. This is why Emotional Intelligence is so important in this journey and we can’t embark on the Path to Spirit unless we release things in our vibration that make us feel unworthy of having Healthy Lives and relationships. We work through what is known as “victim mentality” quite a bit but I think there is a huge misconception as to what this really means. The Truth is that no ONE wants to be a “victim” but quite often we have traumas in our Lives that haven’t been seen and released. When people are faced with trauma, any kind of trauma, in that moment they also become a “victim” – it’s really just that simple. Some traumas are big and others small but it makes no difference to the one experiencing it, trauma is trauma. It ‘s when we don’t deal with the trauma that we get in “trouble”. For example, if you don’t think your trauma is important or traumatic enough to recognize or Heal from then you may put it away somewhere but deep inside still carry the emotions the trauma brought. What people sometimes don’t understand is that Good things, including major Life changes, can cause “trauma” too such as having a baby or getting married. Spiritual Awakenings cause a form of PTSD sometimes when it causes us to reassess everything in our Lives and leave behind belief systems in the form of “religion” and other things we may have believed before but are deeply questioning in the Awakening. We talk a lot about instant gratification in that Spiritual Awakening is a deep process of Self-Awareness and it’s easy to want to cut and run away from the Path when it gets a little rocky. It takes great strength and resilience to stick to the Path when the lessons come hard, fast, and with great intensity. This is where it’s important to BE still and know that you (I and We) are “God” and the Creators of our “reality” by way of the energetic vibes we are putting out into the Universe. This is where we begin to see and know our Intuition and that it will never lead us the wrong way if we Listen.
There are what’s known as Spiritual “egos” out there that run in Spiritual circles and it’s important to Trust our Intuition in our physical reality. I believe in Angels and protecting myself from negative energy as much as anyone but we also have to be Aware of the reality we are Living in and others mental and emotional well-being (or lack thereof). It helps to accept the fact that in order to be Whole in a Spiritual sense we also have to be Whole in an Emotional sense. It’s important to set boundaries with ourselves and others. When others can’t or won’t respect those boundaries it shows that they have no boundaries or respect of their own. To know our own Power is to know that we are Creating our reality whether we are Aware of it or not. When one is in chaos they continue to not only Create chaos but to bring it into the Lives of others if we Allow it. I have a few tips for entering into Spiritual relationships as well as other kinds of relationships when one is going through the Spiritual Awakening process. My first “rule” in this process is “first, do no harm” and we can’t even begin to practice this rule until we get to know one another and our experiences. For example, if someone were to ask deeply personal sexual questions while standing behind faith or some sort of “religious” education then I would consider this to be harmful because the relationship has yet to be formed so therefore I have no choice but to assume the vibe of the relationship is sexual in nature. These kinds of people can be dangerous if they think they come from a “high” place but are actually still practicing from a lower vibrational reality of trying to have an unhealthy emotional need met by way of a project or distraction to keep from looking withIN in order to have the need met. We have to understand that Spirit is withIN and when we are unable to maintain our focus withIN we begin to look for our needs in an external way at which time it ceases to be Spiritual and begins to be emotionally unhealthy for Self and others. Another perspective in entering into relationships is to ask yourself whose emotional needs are being met by that relationship and why. It is a most precarious line to walk when one is riding the high wave of Awakening but have yet to do the emotional work necessary in order to evolve in this process. We all want to be there for one another but we have to recognize whether something is healthy first, healthy for you and healthy for them all at once. If it’s not mutually healthy then it’s not healthy at ALL.
Another factor is that all relationships are mirrors into oneself and what one sees may be what one lacks, Spiritually and/or Emotionally speaking. In other words, we have to have something in our possession in order to see it in another. I cannot see inner Beauty in another if I don’t have inner Beauty in my possession. By the same token, I cannot see judgment in another if I do not also have the emotion of judgment in my possession. This is important and we tell our Butterflies all the time when we are working through trauma. Many times friends and family refuse to understand the emotional journey and as we rise into our Divinity it is difficult for them to see Spiritual and Emotional Intelligence if they don’t have it in their possession just yet. Therefore, if a person is working through an emotional trauma and is exploring emotions around said trauma they may be putting out a lower vibrational vibe, no matter how inadvertently. Even if the person is highly Emotionally Intelligent, a person who doesn’t have Emotional Intelligence in their possession would maybe only see the “victim” but not be able to see the Whole Spiritual BEing because they are not capable. The Spiritual “ego” stands on its own in thinking it has the corner on some kind of Spirituality and in that mentality sets out to “save” others who they see as being “vulnerable”. It helps to keep in mind that if anyone is entering a relationship in order to “fix” something about you they see as being broken this is NOT a Healthy relationship rather it is the Spiritual “ego” that indeed needs “fixing” – and this obviously goes both ways if one is pursuing this kind of relationship. Another way of saying the same thing is if a person is entering into a relationship seeing what they perceive as being “wrong” with that person instead of seeing what is Right with them. This tells of a deep negativity withIN that person who sees “lack” instead of Strength, Beauty, or any number of Positive characteristics and it’s exactly this “negativity” that those of us on a Spiritual Path are trying to “avoid” because it is something that is mostly projected outward. It’s a necessary and important step in the Awakening process that we find all of our fears and traumas withIN so that we do not put out the wrong kind of vibes and attract unhealthy relationships into our Lives. I believe it’s easier to be Compassionate when we realize that the “ego” is nothing more than unresolved fear or trauma and not this big, horrible thing that we have to overcome in order to be in a Spiritual place. We have a Beautiful Mind together with an Amazing capacity to Heal but we cannot do that if going into any kind of relationship thinking one person is “above or below” the other, Spiritually or otherwise. This is not coming from a High place rather a chaotic place of wanting a deep emotional need to be met from an outside source and it just doesn’t work that way.
When we find our weakness we find our Strength simply because the weakness was exposed – this is a great Gift and Gratitude is most important in these situations. When we embark on the Path of Spirit we find all our needs are met and Always have been rather it is only our perception that needs to be changed. This is how we build our Spiritual “armor” if you will. It’s a careful process of emotional catch and release – catch the fear, the doubt, the trauma, the resentment and then release it into the Universe. As we become fearless in our Spirit we embody more and more the Love that we ARE. It takes a combination of Spiritual and Emotional Intelligence coupled with trusting Self and Intuition aided by psychology, logic, and reason in order to find oneself in a Healthy place. Now you see the “enemy”, the fear, and once you know your enemy it is yours to “defeat”. I will end with a most fitting quote from the movie “Ender’s Game” – in this case I see the “enemy” as the fears withIN…
“In the moment when I truly understand my enemy, understand him well enough to defeat him, then in that very moment I also love him. I think it’s impossible to really understand somebody, what they want, what they believe, and not love them the way they love themselves. And then, in that very moment when I love them…. I destroy them.”
― Orson Scott Card, Ender’s Game
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